The Rebuff

[Jenifer Madson]

The Rebuff

We talked in our last post about proposing a financial relationship with your partner that is based on making things right with your money without making each other wrong in the process, and what to do if you've gotten a 'yes.' Today we're focused on what to do if your partner won't cooperate.

First, you have to ask yourself, 'Am I willing to do what's necessary to create my own financial security?' If you are, then go through the same steps we recommended last week of choosing the most pressing financial issue that needs your attention, and taking steps to improve it, then moving on to the next issue, and the next.

But what do you do about your partner in the meantime? I'm asked over and over if two people who are different with money can still make it, financially and romantically. Sure they can, if 'different' doesn't equal 'destructive.' If it does, then perhaps you need to separate your funds to protect your credit, your overall financial security, and the relationship.

Take A Minute:
Is it necessary to separate financially from your partner?

Make A Minute:
Choose how to separate your finances, be it opening a separate bank account, removing your partner from your credit cards, etc., and then take the steps to accomplish it. Tell your partner what you have chosen to do and why.

If the two of you simply have different ways of reaching the same, productive financial goals, then figure out how to leverage the best parts of your differences, and carry on. If you can't agree to collaborate with your money, then at least agree to carry on separately.

Next week:Financial Compatibility.